Monday, November 24, 2008

How do I get to such a party?

I read about the sex blogging party in NYC at Lex's blog. I'm jealous! But I won't be sitting on the sidelines, no! I will be... well, sitting at my desk, blogging.

And out doing things in the world, I think. I am no wallflower. But I think I might be too much of a sap for the sex blogging community. Too early to tell, with a month's worth of posts and a half-dozen readers. Surely it must take all comers... no pun intended, I swear.

But since I'm at my desk a lot these days. Email archives are a marvelous thing, aren't they? Especially since so much of my romantic life feels like it is, was, conducted through correspondence. I was re-reading correspondence with Voice. I lost her for more than a year before figuring out that I needed her in my life. During that year we sent these notes crackling with pain and love to each other every few months. I would get a note from her and feel angry for a day before writing back. She would get my reply and feel like I'd slapped her face, she says now. But as I read our notes, I realize how neither of us knew what was really up with the other. What we wrote makes so much more sense now than it did then. I wish I could go back and give the old Verbal advice. He would have handled things better. He did as well as he could given what he knew. Well, he could probably have done a little better than he did. But if I could go back three years, I would have so much to tell him.

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